impasshamate

impasse: a situation in which no progress is possible

shame: condition of humiliating disgrace

passionate: strong emotion, love

You just want to be a male whore

Fuck you i said

You don’t get me at all

you said you were getting where my head was

And what was driving my creation

And it was in that moment that

I saw the darkness behind the light

darkness that would shroud me

All my days if I stayed

Judgement from her depth

One that she would never be able to change

I will always disappoint you

I will never live up to your ideal

I do not subscribe to all that you are

And I won’t feel guilty about that

It makes us different

But I will always be the one that is broken and wrong

In your eyes

You say your heart is pure

and love is all there is

But your words and sighs

Give your critical heart away

I’m sure you want to tell me all you wanted was a nice meal

At the four seasons hotel

And that I ruined it by storming away

But what else could I do?

Me being me and you being you

And I will never believe you accept me

For who I am

That you will compare me to another man

That you believe is out there for you

As if that should hurt me when you say it

Because that is how you demean it

And how you settled for me

When you could have been so much more

Yet you idolize and lionize a man

Who you knew cheated for years

Because she just didn’t understand him

Perhaps she judged him

Which is why he sought more accepting waters

Something I suppose I’ve been swimming toward

My whole life

Our passion is at an impasse

You do not want to stay with me

Because I am not wired like you

And you should do what you want to do

And believe what you want to believe

Because staying with me will always

Break your heart

As I don’t live up to expectations hidden and unsaid

Only to be berated for not reading your mind

And made to feel shame for what I feel

As if what I feel can’t be real

I don’t begrudge your feelings

They are what they are

And you need to be authentically you

I would not want it any other way

But I cannot be with you

Any longer

Because we both need to be happy

And so this is the moment

Where we start our new lives

Still entwined are our hearts

Hurting to see the other go

Because those moment in each others light

Were happiness and bliss

Sealed with kisses deep

But not deep enough for forever

I wrote my promises come with an asterisk

So I would make no more that I could not keep

Your love has its own restrictions

Usually based on ease and convenience

As long as it doesn’t disrupt

I want to live free and true

And so do you

But our truths and freedoms aren’t the same

And neither of us is to blame

But you’ll need something to tell people

So they won’t look down their noses

Can’t think of a reason more

Convenient that he was a man whore