Out Of Chances

I thought I would reach out

To tell you I still love you

And maybe there was a way

But then your assumptions

Got in the way again

And I felt that familiar

Smallness

That smallness that you

Tell me you feel

When I do the same thing to you

But smallness is our two way street

And no matter how I try

To say things that I really feel

Small is the only thing that is real

From the judgement that you can’t conceal

You say I don’t talk to you

And that I just wanted to get away

As fast as I could

But I did want to talk

And I just wanted to stay

But I couldn’t make it good

The walls that you erect

And emotions you deflect

Lack of grace to truth inspect

And fear to not all seem perfect

Has closed both our hearts

Our emotions completely wrecked

And the coldness of my self defense

My awareness and reactions sometimes dense

My lack of emotional common sense

Have built up an unscalable fence

And left you in the air in suspense

So we both sit and constantly feel uncertain

Thinking the other had original sin

No matter what form it was in

External searching or judgement within

Both hearts broken vessels earthen

Longing for what could have been

Time will heal and soften our stances

But we’ll always share our loving glances

And laughing at how the other dances

Left to just resolving finances

Resigned to the fact that we’re out of chances